Refresh

This weekend my friend Brandi, treated me to a wonderful weekend event called Refresh.  It took place at Overlake Christian Church on Friday evening and all day Saturday.  This was the first ever Refresh Conference and was for "connection, support and healing for adoptive/foster parents.

We heard amazing speakers and there were about 200+ people in attendance.  I have never been around so many people who could understand what my life is like-the joys and the sorrows of adoption.  Some of the talks I heard were

• Dealing with Difficult Children by Gary Benton
• Anger and Arguing: Avoiding Both to Parent with Humor by Claudia Fletcher
• Hope in Hard Places by Lisa Qualls & Kathleen Hamer

We were also totally pampered with delicious goodies all weekend, bubble baths, lotions, free coffee bar coupons, amazing worship.  I feel like I have come away from the weekend with a new perspective and ideas.

One thing that I am really struggling with right now is how to make our family work.  It has taken 3 years for me to comes to terms with the fact that we are not a "typical" family.One of our kids has experienced severe trauma in their early years and in order to parent her right we need to do things different.  To be honest, things are not working well for us right now.  Things our not structured enough for Naomi.  We love our loose schedule which is one of the benefits of homeschooling.  But Naomi has a hard time with it.

This weekend I was blessed to talk with and hear Lisa Qualls speak.  She also is a homeschooling mom with 7 bio kids and 4 adopted.  She said that some of her adopted kids need to be in traditional school for the structure and for everyone else at home to regroup and have a break.  When I heard that I cried because in my mind everything should be equal and the same for all my kids even though I know what we are currently doing isn't working. 

Other parents have hired people to come in and help them for a few hours because kids who have experienced trauma can be so all consuming.  Darrick and I feel like we have a lot to think and pray about.  We want to do what is best for each of our children and also what is best for us as a family.

Port Gardner Open House

 Last night Port Gardner had their 1st semester Open House.  This semester the boys took "The Science of Sound", "Super Sleuths" and an "Art Class".  Once again they really enjoyed their classes.  Darrick and I enjoyed seeing all their hard work and projects.  Naomi even had one on the wall!

Micah's Wire Sculpture of a wolf

Micah's African Mask

Jacob's Sound Science Project

Micah's Sound Science Project

Celebrating Jacob's 9th Birthday

Can you tell what Jacob is in to this year?

Rosabelle

 At the beginning of January, Naomi got her first pet: a hamster she has named Rosabelle.  One of the other chiefs that Darrick works with was looking for a new home for the hamster since her children are now older.  Naomi is learning how to care for her and clean her cage.  She enjoys putting her in her ball and watching her roll all around the house.

 Now someone else at Darrick's work is trying to give us a puppy that will be born at the end of February...

New Year-2012

Things have been busy but one thing on my list is to keep up with our blog.

The end of 2011 left us with two big questions about what God wanted for us as a family.

We ended the year with our 2nd failed adoption.

It was time for us to pick our next set of orders and so far nothing in WA was available.

So we started off 2012 with a fast.  A food fast for Darrick and I and an electronics fast for the whole family.  The big thing Darrick wanted to deal with was anger.  It is something we knew could rear its ugly head after his deployment as a sign of post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).  It took awhile but it happened.  It has been hard for us both to deal with.  He is getting help and has people in his life that are now helping him through it.  The big thing that I wanted to deal with was our failed adoptions and if God was saying we are done having kids then I need to be at peace with it.

We also met with each of the kids and had them make 3 goals for the year.  One that has to do with their relationship with God, one thing they want to learn or try and one way they can help others and/or our community.

Darrick and I both have peace and feel that God is telling us that we are a family of 5.  We need to focus on the 3 children that God has given us and teach them His ways.  This verse really spoke to me Acts 10:2 "He and all his family were devout and God-fearing; he gave generously to those in need and prayed to God regularly".  I also have a sense that God is calling our family to do missions in some way or sometime.

We want to take this year to build our relationships with the kids.  Micah and Darrick have started meeting every other Saturday morning for breakfast and Bible Study.

We also got an answer about our orders.  Darrick will be stationed at Naval Station Bremerton, WA so we don't have to move!